Dear Diary,

Today, I realize that our life is complicated. Sometimes, we feel statisfied with our life but sometimes we feel sad and angry and full of hatred towards our life. Why, why our life is like this. Why can’t our life full of happiness? I always said to myself that with the mixture of good times and bad times, then our life will full of spices and will taste good. But, sometimes I don’t think like this, like today. For me, It’s very hard to accept the death of something you love, something you have put love and nourishment and your time for it to grow into something you love more. I feel hard to accept such a harsh reality. I know every life on earth will face dead one day and I accept this reality but the reality of where all your love gone suddenly and never come back anymore is just inacceptable for me, no matter temporarily or permanently. You will keep on remembering about the harsh reality every time you see or hear something that triggers your memory about your past.

I want to admit that I am having such condition in which I could not face the loss of love in my life. Not just the love from somebody but your love to somebody. My dog is going to die soon. Same thing happen to my parents in not far future. So, I always asked myself to cherish every moment I have with my family and everything you had, everything you love and everything you had instilled love into. Although one of my dog had died and it will soon followed by my other dog, but I don’t want to just stop giving love. I will be so sad when the love I am giving all this year and time to something I love the most has vanished. But, I don’t want to stop right there by stopping giving love. I would want my world to become a much more kind and caring place to live in. Although, our world may not be perfect and so do us as a human but I still want to improve the world I live in by improving myself first and later the people around me. And this is how the good thing spreads.

My dog will die one day, I have to accept it. But if you don’t want to accept it, are you going to just stop giving love. For me I would say no because love for me is important. It lets me to learn about how much beautiful the world is and further I will appreciate our world and my life and the time I spent with the people around me.

So in the end I would like to conclude that we give love and things died. These two things seem like two different things that cannot be discussed together but they are the things that are found in your life and what I said before these magnificent things are making your life meaningful is because from the harsh reality and the sweet memory, we learn to appreciate the time you spent with the things you love because of the existence of the harsh reality. It makes you more experienced and knowledgeable. It shapes you into a man you can proud of. You know you have gone through a lot and you are feeling thankful because you have get over the problem you have been painful of before.     

Written in 9-7-13